Tag: Focus Friday

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Focus Friday: Let’s Focus on Seizing the Day

Last Saturday was a beautiful day here in South Dakota.

Gary suggested that we go kayaking on the Missouri River.

Now, it would have been easy to push that idea aside and just do our normal Saturday stuff. It takes some work to get the kayaks ready and gather the paddles and life jackets. It takes time to drive to the river. But we decided to go for it.

After we decided to kayak, we ran into another obstacle. The Missouri River was so low that our normal spot to get in was impossible. There wasn’t enough water to float in the little bay leading to the big river. We drove around and checked out other spots, walking from parking lots and figuring we’d get stuck in the mud if we attempted to get in the river there.

We finally parked by the little wayside chapel right by the Platte-Winner bridge and carried the kayaks down a hill. My flip-flops seemed like a poor choice on the steepest part of the route to the water. But we made it.

During the summer, I had begged Gary to let me kayak under the bridge to the other side of the river, but he had (wisely) refused to allow it. The wind, waves, and lots of boats on the water would have made it pretty tough to paddle the mile across the Missouri.

But last Saturday was perfect. No wind, no waves, and no boats. We got in, shoved off, and peacefully paddled under the huge cement supports of the bridge.

It was just as cool as I’d imagined it would be when I begged to do it this summer. So peaceful and so neat to go under the bridge and hear the cars passing by overhead.

We made it to the other side without any problems.

We turned around to go back and decided to go south of the bridge so the trucks could see us as they crossed. It was rewarding to hear a couple of them honk when they saw us.

It was so much fun to cross the mile-wide Missouri River on November 28.

We could have missed it if Gary hadn’t recognized how perfect the day was for making my wish come true.

We could have missed it if we had decided it wasn’t worth the effort and stayed home.

We could have missed it if we had given up trying to find a good place to get in the water.

I’m glad we seized the day and pushed through the obstacles so we could enjoy our little adventure.

I wonder how many things we miss out on because we don’t always seize the day. Let’s keep our eyes, minds, and hearts open to all of the opportunities around us. Just think of all the adventures we’ll have if we do that!

“Be very careful, then, how you live—not as unwise but as wise, making the most of every opportunity, because the days are evil. Therefore do not be foolish, but understand what the Lord’s will is.” (Ephesians 5:15–17 NIV)

Do you make sure to seize the day, or do you miss out because you get stuck in your normal patterns of life? How can focusing on God help you to make the most of every opportunity that comes up?

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Focus Friday: Let’s Focus on Soft Hearts

The world is a crazy place right now.

I know, there have always been scary, evil, violent things happening, but it feels like it’s gotten worse this year.

If we aren’t careful, we might find ourselves hardening our hearts just to get through it.

It’s understandable. It’s human nature to draw back when we’re confused, frightened, or overwhelmed. And I’m sure most of us are feeling all of those emotions lately.

There’s just one problem, though. Hardening our hearts puts a divide between us and everyone else. Especially when we think differently than other people. We need to have a soft heart if we’re going to interact well with the world around us.

A hard heart keeps us suspicious, cynical, and angry. A soft heart allows us to be trusting, understanding, and compassionate.

We have to keep going to the Lord if we want to have soft hearts. Reading his promises to us in the Bible, thanking him for the blessings in our lives, and praying for the Holy Spirit to work in us are all ways we can get rid of that heart of stone and have soft hearts once again.

“I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit in you; I will remove from you your heart of stone and give you a heart of flesh.” (Ezekiel 36:26 NIV)

How’s your heart lately? Is it hard because of all of the chaos in the world right now? How can focusing on God help you to have a soft heart instead?

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Focus Friday: Let’s Focus on Being Satisfied

On Wednesday at youth group, we talked about the traps and snares the devil sets for us and how we can get free from them.

In our discussion time with the eighth grade girls I help mentor, I shared that I really felt that I fell into the trap of overeating way too often. Just that day I had gone to the cupboard in search of a candy bar leftover from Halloween, but I told the girls that I felt like God was saying, “No, you don’t have to eat that right now. You’re not hungry.” So I obeyed and put it back.

At one point in this conversation, one of the girls exclaimed in surprise, “Wait! It’s a sin to eat too much?”

I tried to explain that it can be a sin without heaping shame on these junior high girls who are just starting to think more deeply about what sin is and how they can live for the Lord. I’m not sure I succeeded in getting my point across.

The thing is, we need to be sensitive to the Holy Spirit’s promptings in all areas of life. Eating is the area where God is working in me right now. Over the years, I’ve put on extra pounds because I have run to the fridge or cupboard when I’m bored or stressed, and often I’ve continued eating way past the feeling of full signaling that it’s time to stop.

Is that sin? Yes.

Is it hard to see it as sin? Yes.

James 1:14 says, “Each person is tempted when they are dragged away by their own evil desire and enticed.” I’m caught in the trap Satan set up for me because he knows my weakness for candy, ice cream, and chips.

The only way out of the trap I’m in is repentance. Being truly sorry when I eat when I’m not hungry or eat past that feeling of full. So far, I’ve said I’m sorry, but my actions prove that I’m not completely honest (with myself or God).

God loves me unconditionally. He loves every single pound of me. He’ll keep loving me no matter what pants size I wear.

But he wants my heart. When I feel unsatisfied, he doesn’t want me running to the cupboard, he wants me to run to him.

I can eat whatever I want when I’m hungry, but the Spirit gently nudges me when I sin by overeating. He points out that a bowl of ice cream (when I’m already full from lunch) will not satisfy me. It will just taste good for a few bites and then it might taste like regret.

Hopefully I’ve given you some things to chew on this week. If overeating isn’t a sin you struggle with, maybe you can think of something that has been a trap for you and apply the same principles:

Your desire leads to temptation and sin. You give in and get caught in the trap. You can stay there, or you can repent and get free.

Being satisfied with the relationship we have with Jesus can keep us from falling into the traps of sin that are set for us.

“Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they shall be satisfied.” (Matthew 5:6 ESV)

Is it hard to see some of the things you do as sin? How can focusing on God help you to be honest with yourself and turn away from those things, choosing to be satisfied with God instead?

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Focus Friday: Let’s Focus on Believing in What Matters

Is anyone else tired of words lately?

They come at us from every direction. Everyone wants to tell us something, or warn us about something, or sell us something.

It’s exhausting after a while. That’s why I’ve been scrolling faster through my Facebook feed. That’s why I’m sending more and more emails directly to the trash instead of taking the time to do much more than skim them. That’s why I’m avoiding the news on television. Too much of all of those things suck the life right out of me.

It seems like there’s only one time and place where words give me energy and hope. It’s in the mornings when I read my Bible.

This morning a passage from John reminded me that believing in Jesus is the only thing that really matters. If we believe in him, then we’ll live (even after we die physically). And if we live for him, we’ll never die.

You won’t hear that from the words of the world. Those voices want you to believe in yourself, the government, the economy, the entertainment industry, and everything but Jesus.

Those things don’t bring life. They all fall short and fail us sooner or later. Jesus is the only one who will never fail us.

It sounds too good to be true for people who hang on every word the world utters. But it’s not too good to be true. It’s the only thing that is true.

That’s enough of my words for today. Check out God’s words in the Bible and you’ll see how they bring you back to believing in what really matters.

“I am the resurrection and the life. The one who believes in me will live, even though they die; and whoever lives by believing in me will never die.” (John 11:25–26 NIV)

Are you tired of all the words you hear and read each day? How can focusing on God help you sift through those words and believe what matters?

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Focus Friday: Let’s Focus on Self-Promotion

Something exciting happened this week.

I’m on a podcast! My friend Janell Wood interviewed me back in September about my experience with depression, and “my” episode of the Finding Something Real podcast went live on Wednesday.

My first thought was to share it everywhere, but then my brain started to protest.

You can’t do that! That’s self-promoting! Christians are supposed to be humble and that’s definitely not humble to tell everyone you’re on a podcast.

Thankfully, I decided to catch those thoughts and take a closer look at them. Is it bad to tell others about something that could be helpful? Is it prideful to share a resource that could encourage or inspire lots of people?

I did a quick Google search about self-promotion and found an interview from 2008 with John Piper: What Is the Difference Between Good and Bad Self-Promotion?

In it, he asks: Is it right for a Christian to want to be influential?

His answer: If what is influencing people is the truth, the beauty of Christ, the glory of God—”Yes, it’s right and good.”

How reassuring!

When we create something—an article, a work of art, a book, a song, a poem—we can share it with confidence if it’s true and if our desire is to glorify God (not ourselves).

People will get turned off pretty quickly if they see us saying, “Look at me! Look at me! Look at me!” But they’ll appreciate what we’re sharing when we say, “Look at what God has done for me! I want to tell you about this so God can work in your life, too!”

Matthew 6:1 warns: “Be careful not to practice your righteousness in front of others to be seen by them. If you do, you will have no reward from your Father in heaven.”

That’s bad self-promotion, but we can confidently practice good self-promotion because we know people will see God in the things we share.

As for me, God brought me through a terrible time of depression. If my story can help others, I’ll gladly risk being misunderstood as I do a bit of self-promotion. (And if you think it might help someone you know, please consider telling them about the podcast or this blog. Thanks!)

“So whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God.” (1 Corinthians 10:31 NIV)

Does self-promotion make you uncomfortable? How can focusing on God help you to confidently share things that will help others?

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Focus Friday: Let’s Focus on Forgetting the Past

Thinking too much about our past can really mess up how we’re living in the present and stifle our possibilities for the future.

I’m not saying we should completely wipe out all memories of the past. Reliving good times and successes can bring us joy and boost our confidence. Remembering mistakes and failures can keep us from making the same errors all over again.

We get into trouble when we rehearse the past (especially the negatives) over and over again in our minds. I don’t think it does us any good to dwell on what we could have done differently, how we should have responded, or what we would have done if we could go back and relive those moments.

We did something. We made the best (or worst) choice we could have made at the time. Now we have to live with it and move on.

We remember, but we choose to forget the past so that we can move forward. (If that’s extremely difficult to do, it may help to talk to a professional counselor so you can get unstuck.)

Let’s spend the majority of our time taking advantage of the present so we can look forward to an even better future.

“One thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.” (Philippians 3:13–14 NIV)

Do you spend way too much time thinking about the past? How can focusing on God help you to live well right now?

I did a short video on this topic tonight over in my “Catch Your Thoughts with Robyn Mulder” Facebook group. Check it out…and if you want to see more videos that might help you catch your thoughts, I invite you to join the group.

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Focus Friday: Let’s Focus on Pressing On through the Struggle

No one ever said life would be easy.

So why do we get upset when things don’t go the way we plan and we struggle?

For years, I thought something was wrong with me if I couldn’t stay “happy” all the time.

The older I get, the more I realize how idealistic that is. No one can be happy constantly. There is an ebb and flow to life. There are ups and downs. There is joy and sadness.

I’m getting more comfortable with that wavering rhythm of life.

I was reassured when I listened to an episode of Hal Elrod’s podcast this week. He talked about feeling overwhelmed and frustrated for a couple of hours one day because of all the things he had to do. He admitted that he made absolutely no progress on any of the things on his to-do list during those hours. When he finally realized what was happening, he was able to take some steps to get back to being productive. (I’ll let you listen to the podcast if you want to know what he did.)

If a famous, successful, highly productive person can have a setback every once in a while, then I shouldn’t be alarmed or ashamed when it happens to me.

The key is to not stay in that state for too long.

Recognize that you’re struggling, acknowledge the situation, take a break if you have to, and then press on.

We can’t accomplish everything on our list in one day, but if we keep pressing on, we’ll see results and be able to achieve many of our goals. Press on, my friends!

“I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.” (Philippians 3:14 NIV)

Do you get overwhelmed and frustrated easily? How can focusing on God help you to take a deep breath and press on through the struggle?

https://miraclemorning.com/achieve-goals-when-struggling/

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Focus Friday: Let’s Focus on Finishing Well

Last week I told you about the first part of our attempt to hike for a week in Tennessee. I didn’t count the cost, so we adjusted our plans and decided to end our trip after four days (instead of seven).

After we made the decision to quit, we still had to get through two cold nights and a day and a half of difficult hiking (mostly uphill).

On Tuesday morning we set out at daybreak. It felt like every time I looked up there was another set of stairs we had to climb. I would go for a while and then stop and lean on my hiking poles while I let my heart rate slow back down. Then I’d take a deep breath and tackle the next hill.

We were still only going an average of about a mile an hour, and my attitude soon leaned toward despair. As I hiked, I started to let out a little whimper with almost every step. I knew I was being pathetic, but I just couldn’t seem to help it.

We finally got to Derrick Knob Shelter at 1:50. We sat and rested a while, then got back on the trail. We still had six miles to go and we knew we were going to have to hike in the dark if we kept up the same pace. Gary had given me a little pep talk during our break. “You look like a really tough hiker chick,” he encouraged me. “You can do this.”

I didn’t believe that I looked like a great hiker, but I chose to think that way. I hiked to the rhythm of a short, punchy phrase for a while, but it included a naughty word and I didn’t feel right about it. (Pastors’ wives never swear, do they?) So I changed it. God’s glorious hiker chick. God’s glorious hiker chick. It was silly, but it worked. With every word I stabbed my poles down in front of me. When the trail flattened out, I tried to go as fast as I could. When it went up again, I tried to go farther before I stopped to rest.

We talked to a southbound hiker who asked where we were headed. “Silas Bald Shelter,” we answered. He looked shocked. “Some people have big, audacious goals,” he muttered as he hiked away.

I kept up my hiking mantra. My I-can’t-do-this whimper disappeared and my attitude changed. It was still hard, but I became even more determined to get to our next campsite before dark. We enjoyed a few spots with beautiful views of the Smoky Mountains, but most of the trail was surrounded by trees. We did make it to the shelter before dark!

Wednesday we hiked the last five miles, finally leaving the woods and merging with the groups of tourists walking to Clingmans Dome on the paved road. We noticed that they all kept their distance from us (even more than six feet!). Guess not showering for a few days bothers some people.

We sat at the foot of the observation tower for a while, then climbed it (leaving our packs at the bottom). We hiked down the road to the parking lot and found a spot to lie down and wait for my parents to get there and pick us up.

We were tired, but proud of ourselves for making it as far as we did. We had challenged ourselves, pushed our limits, and finished well. I hope I can do the same in the rest of life.

I want to challenge myself to do great things. Even if I have to alter my plans once in a while, I’ll keep moving forward with an I-can-do-it attitude.

I want to push my limits. I don’t do that very often because it’s uncomfortable, but I know I’ll grow physically, emotionally, and spiritually when I do something that’s outside my comfort zone.

I want to finish well. I don’t want to get to the end of my life and wish I had accomplished more, loved better, and enjoyed life more. I’m God’s glorious hiker chick and I’m going to finish the race, giving glory to the God who loves me and is with me every step of the way!

“However, I consider my life worth nothing to me; my only aim is to finish the race and complete the task the Lord Jesus has given me—the task of testifying to the good news of God’s grace.” (Acts 20:24 NIV)

How are you traveling through life? Do you think “I can’t do this”? How can focusing on God help you to finish life well, whatever lies ahead?

Here are some more pictures of our Appalachian Trail adventure:

A nice view of the Smoky Mountains (Tennessee)
Rockytop – we enjoyed a good break here.
Good to see the white blaze and know we were still on the right trail.
Another view of the Smokies.
We made it to our destination – but we didn’t dare ask anyone to take our picture together.
Gary made it, too! (A scruffy husband is a happy husband.)
Clingmans Dome is the highest point on the AT (6643 feet)

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Focus Friday: Let’s Focus on Counting the Cost

“Let’s hike on the Appalachian Trail when we go to Tennessee in September!”

That was my suggestion earlier this summer. My husband was a bit skeptical, but I was excited. We made our plans, filled our backpacks, and told all our friends and family about our plan to hike seventy miles through the Great Smoky Mountains National Park on the Appalachian Trail.

Never mind the fact that we had never hiked more than two or three days before, and this would be six nights in a tent in the mountains. I was sure it would be fun to camp out.

Never mind the fact that I wasn’t in peak physical shape. I started walking up and down our basement stairs and I strapped on my pack the week before we left and walked five miles with it one day.

Never mind the fact that there are lots of black bears in the Smoky Mountains and we heard disturbing stories about some bear encounters. We picked up a can of bear spray on the way to Tennessee.

We spent a day with my parents, and then my dad drove us over to Fontana Dam where we would start our adventure.

Don’t we look excited? What could possibly go wrong?

Gary had wisely suggested we start our first day with six miles.

It took us six hours to get to Birch Spring Tentsite. We set up camp, hung our food bag on the bear cable, then set up camp again after we found a better spot. We got all snug in our sleeping bags…

And then we froze!

It was the oddest sensation. First I got sweaty and then I would start to shiver violently. I lay on one side for a while, then I would turn to my back, then I would wiggle onto my other side. We had condensation on the inside of the tent, so every time I got close to the wall I would get a little water on my face or in my hair. It was so annoying!

We got up before dawn and packed up our things so we were ready to start hiking when it got light.

It took us from 7:15 a.m. to 5:00 p.m. to go the 11.4 miles to the Spence Field Trail Shelter. We were averaging about one mile per hour.

As we hiked, I was thinking about the rest of our week. The daily miles for the remainder of our hike were 11.8 on Tuesday, 15.3 on Wednesday, 12.6 on Thursday, and 14.6 on Friday (and then just a couple of miles to the pick up point on Saturday).

I couldn’t do it! One mile an hour meant we’d have to hike in the dark part of the time. And five more nights of freezing cold misery? No way! If we could have, we would have gotten off the trail right then and there, but we figured out that we had to either go back twelve miles or forge ahead seventeen miles to a good pickup spot.

We called my parents after we got our tent set up. “Umm, Dad, do you think you could pick us up at Clingman’s Dome on Wednesday?”

Mom and Dad laughed. They had been expecting a call because they had heard it was going to rain on Thursday and Friday (something we hadn’t realized). They also knew it had gotten down into the thirties on Sunday night. They agreed to pick us up.

I hadn’t truly counted the cost of hiking in the mountains. I had thought I was prepared, but I was miserably unprepared for the ups and downs of the trail. I thought I was in good enough shape, but I should have been training harder for our experience.

I think we do this with our faith at times. My Life Application Study Bible has a challenging note about Luke 14:28–30: We must carefully count the cost of becoming Christ’s disciples so that we will know what we are getting into and won’t be tempted later to turn back.

We have to count the cost and be all in as we follow the Lord. No turning back.

I’m glad we had the option of getting off the trail after we figured out that we weren’t ready for an entire week in the Smokies.

We still had to endure two cold nights and a day and a half of tough hiking before we finished. I’ll tell you more about that next week.

“Suppose one of you wants to build a tower. Won’t you first sit down and estimate the cost to see if you have enough money to complete it? For if you lay the foundation and are not able to finish it, everyone who sees it will ridicule you, saying, ‘This person began to build and wasn’t able to finish.’

In the same way, those of you who do not give up everything you have cannot be my disciples.” (Luke 14:28–30, 33 NIV)

Have you ever neglected to count the cost before you attempted something? How did it turn out? How can focusing on God help you to keep going as you follow him?

Here are a few pictures of our first day on the trail:

I’m pointing out the white blazes we would follow along the AT.
A timber rattler. We never would have seen it if some other
hikers hadn’t told us to watch for it.
The view from Shuckstack fire tower. Worth the climb!
Almost to our first campsite.
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Focus Friday: Let’s Focus on Using Our Time Wisely

Gary and I spent some time this week getting ready for a trip that seemed far off on Monday.

At first, my attitude was pretty noncommital (dare I say even a bit annoyed?).

My husband wanted me to look into distances, shelters, and more of the details for our trip in a few weeks. We’re going to hike about seventy miles of the Appalachian Trail through the Great Smoky Mountains National Park in Tennessee. We love hiking, but we’ve never hiked for a whole week. He was right, we needed to figure things out, but I didn’t want to do it yet.

We sat down one night and mapped out how far we plan to hike each day and where we can stay each night. We called my parents to make sure they could drop us off and pick us up at the end. We started making a list of things we need to buy.

This afternoon Gary made me dig out my hiking pants and other gear. We spent some time trying things on and figuring out what we needed to wear. Our extra bedroom now has two neat piles of clothes next to the rest of the supplies we have so far.

It suddenly dawned on me today that we have just a little over two weeks before we hit the trail. That’s not much time! I’m so glad my husband is a planner and he talked me into doing some planning and preparation as we’re looking forward to this adventure.

Left on my own, my tendency is to put things off until the last minute, rush around in a frenzy trying to get something done, and inevitably forget something in my haste. That’s not good when you’re going to be miles from civilization.

I want to practice living more like Gary in other areas of my life, too. Keeping track of what’s ahead on my schedule and doing a little bit at a time to get ready for those events and projects will help me feel more peace.

It’s stressful to put things off. Deadlines get missed, late fees get added, pressure builds up, and anxiety skyrockets.

I think our spiritual lives suffer, too, when we don’t use our time wisely. We can feel guilt and shame because we’re wasting time instead of working on something important.

We can’t be working every minute of every day, but we do need to think about how we’re spending our time. The Holy Spirit will help us find balance and show us how to make the very best use of the time we have.

That’s the way I want to live, even if I fail sometimes. We can start over whenever we want to and determine to use our time wisely.

“Look carefully then how you walk, not as unwise but as wise, making the best use of the time, because the days are evil.” (Ephesians 5:15–16 ESV)

Do you waste too much time? How can focusing on God help you to work hard and use your time wisely?