Tag: focus

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Focus Friday: Let’s Focus on What Really Matters

We’re almost two weeks into a new year and I’m realizing that my focus is all messed up. (Having a blog with mostly “Focus Friday” posts, you’d think I’d have this figured out by now, wouldn’t you?) Keep in mind that I’m not trying to shame myself (or you!) as I explore this topic. We just all need a reminder to get back on track once in a while.

My heart was stirred about this several times in the last couple of weeks, but I haven’t taken the time to write about it, or even think more deeply about it, until now.

The first time it happened was in church last Sunday. Gary preached a sermon from Matthew 6. “What Do You Treasure Most?” was the title. (You can watch it by clicking here.) As he spoke, I felt myself pondering the things I treasure. Of course I love the Lord, but lately my focus seems to be on too many earthly treasures.

Then in Sunday school we watched a video featuring J.D. Greear, talking about Romans 2. He said so many good things, but what bothered me was the idea that we can do all the “right” things, but if our hearts are far from God, it all means nothing. I wondered if my heart was really in the right place. From the outside, it probably looks like it, but I know the struggles I have with loving certain people or having the right attitude when I’m doing those “right” things.

And then I went through this week. On Sunday, I said I was going to be working on formatting my depression book, getting it ready to publish on Amazon KDP pretty soon. It’s now Friday evening, and I haven’t started yet. Why? Because I’m scared. Of what? Of the unknown.

I’ve never done something like this before, so it’s scary. I think I can figure it out, but taking that first step has felt impossible all week. So, I’ve found all sorts of ways to avoid it.

I went swimming most mornings. That was good for my physical and mental health, but I could have shortened my workouts a bit so I could get to the formatting.

I still had the afternoons free, right? Well, I managed to fill those, too. I did some good things, but I also did a fair amount of pointless stuff like watching YouTube videos and playing a blocks game on my phone (I’ve uninstalled it once again!).

By the time it got to the evenings, I felt like it was too late to start, plus I had youth group on Wednesday night.

So, what really matters? And what do I do when I realize I’m not focusing on what really matters?

What really matters is loving God and loving others. When I’m reminded that my focus is more on me (especially on my fears and insecurities), then I need to take steps to find the right balance once again.

Spending some time reading my Bible and praying each morning (and throughout the day) is a great place to start. Too often I skip that so I can exercise or do some other task around the house. Bible reading and prayer get my focus back on loving God.

Something else I can do is ask the Holy Spirit to help me balance my time between my own interests and things I can do to help others (and quite often those are the same thing). Writing blog posts, recording podcast episodes, and finishing my depression book are all things I enjoy doing (when I finally push past the fear and do them). I pray that they can also support and encourage others who might struggle with depression and anxiety. That gets my focus back on loving others.

Our hearts are fickle. Left to their own devices, they’ll try to convince us that we’ll never be happy unless we do whatever we want to do, whenever we want to do it. That’s a lie. True happiness and peace comes from focusing on what really matters. Every day.

“‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.’ The second is this: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ There is no commandment greater than these.” (Mark 12:30–31 NIV)

Do you ever struggle and pay more attention to worldly pursuits instead of what really matters? How can focusing on God help you love God and love others well?

P. S. – I really am planning to finish my depression book in the next couple of weeks. It tells a little of my story, but it also has ideas for how we can all stay healthy emotionally when we have a mental health diagnosis. Let me know if you’d like to read a pdf of the book when I get it done. I just ask that you leave a short review on Amazon after it releases. Just send me a message at robyn@robynmulder.com.

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Focus Friday: Let’s Focus on One Thing at a Time

Some people thrive on having lots of irons in the fire.

Apparently, I am not one of them.

In my younger years I could juggle tons of activities and responsibilities. I look back at all of the things I did when our children were little, and I can hardly recognize myself. How did I get it all done?

The kids are all grown and out of the house now, and I can’t seem to handle much of anything. The more things I add to my calendar, the more anxious I feel. I end up not doing much of anything because I get overwhelmed when I think of everything all at once.

I’ve been feeling that way for several weeks now. All of my tasks and future activities are spinning around in my brain. I get things done when the deadline gets close enough, but I live with way too much stress when I think about everything I “should” be doing and shut down mentally for much of the day.

I know I’ll feel better if I work ahead and make progress on long-term projects and goals.

I’m sure my stress levels will fall if I work hard for a set amount of time and then enjoy some time for relaxation (instead of dreading the work, putting it off, and worrying about it during moments when I’m supposed to be having fun).

Like Mary and Martha in the Bible, I need to focus on one thing at a time. Martha was worried and upset about all of the work she had to do, but Mary recognized that sitting at Jesus’ feet was the best thing to do in that moment.

That will help me as I move forward. I do take time for reading the Bible each day, but figuratively sitting at Jesus’ feet as I go through the rest of the day might help me focus on one thing at a time instead of dreading all of it at once.

Going through my days asking the Holy Spirit to show me what I need to work on might help me get some things done instead of having everything continue to swirl around in my brain and doing nothing.

It’s time to write some things down, schedule time to work on them in my planner, and focus on one thing at a time.

Getting overwhelmed by everything I want to/need to get done will just lead to more angst and procrastination.

Tackling projects one at a time will bring them to completion.

Especially if I keep God first as I go through each day.

“Martha, Martha,” the Lord answered, “you are worried and upset about many things, but few things are needed—or indeed only one. Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her.” (Luke 10:41–42 NIV)

Are you overwhelmed by everything you need to do? How can focusing on God help you work on one thing at a time and enjoy life more as you get things done?

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Super Saturday: Let’s Focus on Starting the New Year Right

We are entering the final days of 2019.

If you’re like most people, you may be considering resolutions you want to make for the new year.

Or maybe you’re starting to make a list of all of the goals you want to complete in 2020.

I know. I feel it, too. I look at all of the bad habits indulged in this year and I want to resolve to eradicate every single one from my life – by March 1.

I see all of the goals I didn’t complete–and all of the time I wasted–and I want to make a detailed plan to complete every single thing on my list (and maybe add ten more, because I’m sure if I managed my time better I could do them all).

We can’t do that. If we do, we’re setting ourselves up for disappointment, failure, and frustration. When we’re focusing on fixing all of our shortcomings and doing all of the things we think we need to do to have a good, successful life, we’re going to end up feeling pressured and agitated when life doesn’t go as planned.

There’s a better place to put our focus. On God.

“You will keep in perfect peace those whose minds are steadfast, because they trust in you.” (Isaiah 26:3 NIV)

When we start there–with our focus on God–we can feel peace as we trust Him and live our lives each day.

When we start the new year with our focus on God, He’ll give us the wisdom we need to decide what habits we need to work on changing – with His help. He’ll help us discern what our goals should be and give us the energy and drive to complete them.

Starting the new year like this will allow us to begin 2020 with joy in our hearts, excited about all of the opportunities and possibilities the year will bring, instead of weighed down with all of our own demands and expectations.

Now that’s a good way to start.

Happy New Year!

“You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.” (Jeremiah 29:13 NIV)

Are you excited about the new year, or are you stressed about what you “should” do in 2020? How can focusing on God help you to begin the new year well and enjoy the inevitable ups and downs 2020 will bring?

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Focus Friday: Let’s Focus on Distractions

Let your eyes look straight ahead; fix your gaze directly before you. Give careful thought to the paths for your feet and be steadfast in all your ways. Do not turn to the right or the left; keep your foot from evil. (Proverbs 4:25-27 NIV)

I’m starting this week’s post with a Bible verse so we make sure we know what we’re focusing on. We’re focusing on–

SQUIRRELS!

No, that’s not our focus for today. We have to keep our eyes looking straight ahead so we can go toward the prize and not get distracted by–

SQUIRRELS!

Okay, I’ll stop that before it gets way too annoying. It’s funny when we see that happen in a cartoon, isn’t it? The cute dog gets distracted and loses all of its focus when it catches a glimpse of one of those furry animals.

It’s much less funny when it happens to us. But it does happen, doesn’t it?

We start out our day determined to complete a task, work on a goal, get something done. Then the “squirrels” show up and we go off chasing them.

I’m sure everyone has different varieties of squirrels they chase.

I get distracted by too many emails in my inbox. I signed up for something recently and got on about 20 email lists. I delete quickly, but I can’t quite unsubscribe because I’m afraid I’ll miss something wonderful.

YouTube videos grab my attention. I’m watching something I wanted to see, and then I notice other videos that look interesting lined up along the right side of the screen.

There are all sorts of distractions that tempt us to get our eyes off the prize we’re headed toward: snacks between meals, TV shows, online shopping, and getting stuck in uncertainty (A big one for me – I don’t know what to do next, so I don’t do anything at all).

Joshua Becker over at becomingminimalist.com has a great article about 9 things that can distract us and keep us from living fully. You can click over and read the whole article, but here are a few distractions that hit me hard: Thinking too much about tomorrow, pursuing perfection, ruminating on regrets, and spending too much time comparing ourselves to others.

I’m convinced that the more we resist going after the distractions around us and inside us, the happier and more fulfilled we’ll be. If you don’t believe me, just try–

SQUIRRELS!

“Keep your eyes straight ahead; ignore all sideshow distractions. Watch your step, and the road will stretch out smooth before you. Look neither right nor left; leave evil in the dust. ” (Proverbs 4:25-27 The Message)

Are you often distracted by things going on around you or thoughts inside your head? How can focusing on God help you to ignore those distractions and move forward with Him?

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Focus Friday: Let’s Focus on Drilling Down

drilling down for blog

I watched an interview this week with Lindsey Hartz (part of the Flourish Writers Conference). She was talking about how a writer needs to “drill down” into an audience and get really specific about who they want to reach.

That stuck with me, and I even went back and watched the video again. I realized that I’ve been trying to reach all women everywhere. Maybe that’s why it’s hard to decide what to focus on each week. I consider lots of different topics and try to figure out what might resonate with the most people.

There’s some safety in that. If I give everyone a little of what they want to read then I don’t have to dig too deep into painful subjects. 

But I don’t think I want to do that anymore. I say I’m writing a book about depression and how to stay healthy emotionally, but I flit from task to task, distraction to distraction, doing just about everything but writing the book.

I think it’s time to drill down and focus on a narrower audience. 

I think my calling in this season of life is to bring God’s hope to those who are struggling with depression and other mental illnesses.

If that’s you, then come along as we explore mental health in the weeks and months ahead. There is hope for you, my friend.

If that isn’t you, I still invite you to come along. Even if you don’t have a mental health diagnosis, everyone can benefit from learning ways to stay healthy emotionally.

I think this idea of “drilling down” can apply to many areas of our lives. Let’s not be all over the place, jumping from idea to idea and project to project. Let’s drill down, get specific, and get things done.   

“May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.” (Romans 15:13 NIV)

Are you trying to get everything done instead of drilling down and deciding to target or work on specific things? How can focusing on God help you to narrow your intentions as you go through life?