Focus Friday: Let’s Focus on Birthdays

Today is my birthday.

I wasn’t planning to write about it. It’s not a “special” birthday. Almost halfway between 50 and 60, I always have to do the math when someone asks me how old I am (I know I’m 54 today, but I’ll probably forget by next week).

Gary and the kids (near and far) wished me a happy birthday this morning. We didn’t go anywhere special (but we’re planning to go out for supper next week). I cleaned a little, did an editing job, and had a pretty normal day.

A friend dropped off a card and a plate of goodies when I wasn’t looking. Another friend dropped off a chicken (for the freezer – not a live one!) and stayed to chat for a while. All day long I heard little pings coming from my phone and I knew birthday messages were coming in on Facebook.

I saw a few of them earlier in the day, but I finally sat down to “like” each of them tonight. So many messages from so many friends and family members. As I tapped and scrolled through all of them, I was overwhelmed by how rich my life is.

There were greetings from people in Michigan (where I grew up), and then from Rock Rapids, Iowa (where we lived after we got married); Orange City, IA (my college years and later, Gary’s); Holland, Michigan (seminary years); Chandler, Minnesota (our first church); Allison, Iowa (our second church); and Platte, South Dakota (where we are now).

I had messages from childhood friends, high school friends, college friends, lots of family members, church and community friends from all over, and so many writer friends.

I needed that reminder of all of the people God has brought into my life over the years.

They have each made my life better in some way, and I hope I’ve added to their lives as well.

Facebook showed me greetings from a small percentage of all of the people I actually know and love in my life. A birthday is a good day to remember, to give thanks, and to look forward to all of the people God will bring into my life in the year ahead.

Thank you for your friendship, whether you wrote on my wall or not. If we haven’t actually met yet, I hope we do that very soon. Oh, and in case I missed yours: Happy Birthday!

“The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom, and knowledge of the Holy One is understanding. For through wisdom your days will be many, and years will be added to your life.” (Proverbs 9:10-11 NIV)

Do you ever take time to think about all of the people God has brought into your life? How can focusing on God help you to be grateful for each birthday you celebrate?

Focus Friday: Let’s Focus on a Dear Abbie Letter

*Note: I’m moving some of my old blog posts here to robynmulder.com and I’m starting with this one from January of 2016. It’s a favorite of mine since it came to me so easily and I love this family so much. As an update, Abbie just finished her freshman year of college and plans to do some mission work in Africa (probably next summer, I think her mom said). Her mom is still immensely proud of her. Enjoy!

Dear Abbie,


I saw that look on your face the other morning.


Your mom started crying when she talked about your 16th birthday coming up today. She laughed and brushed away the tears and tried to explain. “It just went by so fast!” She talked a little more and ended with, “I just love her.” Then she turned to you and said, “High five. You’re awesome!”


You smiled and gave her a high five, but then your expression returned to that look.


The look of a fifteen-year-old who wonders if her mother is crazy. I know that look. I’ve seen it on the faces of all four of my children. I’ve worn that look as I wondered about my own mother’s sanity at times during my teen years.


She’s not crazy. Moms cry sometimes and you just have to get used to it. Sometimes we cry because we’re happy. Sometimes we cry because we’re sad. Sometimes we cry because we’re angry. Sometimes we cry because our daughters turn sixteen.


I don’t know everything going on in your mom’s mind and heart right now, but I can imagine some of the things she may be feeling.


I imagine she’s remembering herself at your age.


I imagine she’s mourning the “mistake” she made that resulted in your birth when she was just seventeen.


I imagine she’s reliving the embarrassment she felt when people found out about her “mistake.”


I imagine she’s happy about how life turned out over the last sixteen years. After welcoming you into the world, she went on to marry a great guy and they gave you three little sisters to love (and they love you!).


I imagine she’s afraid for you and the choices you’ll have to make in the years ahead. I imagine she’s afraid you might make some mistakes along the way and she wants to save you from that.


I imagine she’s immensely proud of the young woman you’re becoming and she thanks God every day that He gave you to her.


I imagine she’s grateful for the grace she feels knowing that God loves her and has forgiven every single one of her mistakes. I imagine she’s awed by the realization that you were not a mistake; you were part of God’s great plan for her life.


I imagine she knows that the next several years will go by just as fast and you’ll be out on your own before she knows it.


Abbie, you are special, but it’s not because you were born to a teenage mother. You are special because God formed you in your mother’s womb and He has a plan for your life. You are free to follow Him wherever He leads. Each of us is special to God and we all need to follow Him. Keep going, Abbie. If you make mistakes, there’s grace there and you can get back on the right path. There’s grace for all of us sinful people.


Oh, and your mom? She’s not crazy. She’s just a really good mom who loves you so much.


Happy 16th Birthday, Abbie!


“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” (Jeremiah 29:11 NIV)


Have you ever made a “mistake”? How can focusing on God help you to get back on track and follow Him into the future He has planned for you?


*I want to thank my friends Kristen and Abbie for their permission to share this week’s blog post. I am blessed to know them and the rest of their family.